What is in your bag?
Everyone carries a bag at some point in time, women or men, although women do most. We can hardly go out without one. Mothers more, and they carry the heaviest.
I love big bags because I carry a lot of stuff. And now that I’m a mom, I have more stuff so bigger ones. You know those ones that can conveniently take everything you need without needing to carry some extra small bags?
I don’t know if you are like me, so I will just go straight to the point and ask, what do you carry in your bag? And before you ask, I will definitely tell you what I usually carry about in mine..
Here are some of the things you can find in my bag:
You will find my Bible, jotters (one or two), my phone pens, scarf, face towel, power bank, charger, earpiece, keys, pain killers hand cream (my palms get dry) small purse for atm card, my passport photographs, some old receipts, and lipsticks.
Now, that I am a mom, I have added some extra items: snacks, biscuit, tissue paper, more face towels, wipes. Sometimes I have to rush out without makeup, so I do that as soon as I get to work: compact powder, make up brushes, hand mirror, hairbrush and spare spoon for those days when I forget to add them in the lunchbox.
And now because of the Covid 19, spare face masks and hand sanitiser.
So, you see why I carry big bags and why I love them?
There are so many things I need to take with me when I go out or when I go to work. Which is why I wonder what you carry in your bag too?
I am not nosey, I just want to know if I am the only one or if there are other people like me. Even though these things I carry with me everywhere I go leave my bag dirty or make it heavier, I still take them with me.
However, some days I would tell myself, “Girl you need to reduce the content of your bag” Then I would get to it after weeks of procrastination. I would empty the contents on the floor and try to sort them out and even get out all the residue from biscuits, candies, tissue, etc.
I would dust the bag and promise I am leaving some of this stuff at home. “nobody needs this much stuff.” I’ll say to myself.
So, I will pick out the ones I hadn’t used in a while to make the bag lighter. But at the end of the day, all I’ll achieve is dusting the bag, cleaning the mess, and putting everything else back inside.
I would even add some more items that I didn’t put before. I will remember the ones I should have added and might need someday. Instead of making the bag lighter, I will only succeed in making it heavier than before.
Then I will go through the week again with my heavy bag and the thought of getting out some of the items to lighten it. Because I have convinced myself that I cannot survive the day without them.
I must have them with me all the time, even though there are days I ended up not needing or using some or most of them.
This is the same way we approach our lives, our relationships, income and all. We carry some burden, junks, hurt, relationship, people, friends even families, work, because we are convinced we can’t do without them, that we cannot live without them, that we need to have them with us at all times.
We feel we need to keep them close because we might need them. So, we drag around this heavy burden, every day. Even though we are crushed under this luggage we can’t let go.
It affects our health mentally, physically and emotionally, but we can’t let them go because we might need them someday. We can’t let go of the memories, the significance they hold for us, what they represent.
And when you are out there dying under the weight, there comes that moment when we question ourselves and wonder why. Then we add more: guilt, regret and resentment.
Sometimes we take them out and promise to let them go to have more space for good things, good memories. But when we remember all the reasons we need to keep them with us, all the reason we shouldn’t or couldn’t let them go, we dust and put them back.
Then the cycle begins all over again. We drag the weight with us everywhere we go, into our work, our relationships, new or old. Then we pass them onto the people we meet wherever we go, our kids, spouses, colleagues, and neighbour.
And the more we pull this weight about: the hurt, the betrayals, disappointments, insecurities, fear, failure, the more we pick up along the way.
We add strife, quarrels, grudges, frustration, anger from the other relationships we form along the way. Because we wouldn’t let go of the weight we are carrying about, we then transfer them to these new people because we believe that is all we would get from them too, so we transfer the pain from the heavy weight we carry on our shoulders to them. Read: How To Survive When Tragedy Strikes).
When this happens, all we would gain is more burden from, guilt, regret, resentment, shame, emotional or psychological breakdown.
Then the bag keeps getting heavier and heavier.
And after sometimes, we stopped noticing how heavy our bags are. We become used to the weight, it becomes part of us. It becomes who we are.
I know we are supposed to learn from our experiences so that we don’t make the same mistake twice. However, I think sometimes those experiences shape us into the person we don’t want to be. If we are not careful or too careful we might become the person or thing that broke us.
What is in your bag?
If you have one of those things you think you would need but don’t need, I think it is time to bring out the bag and take out some of the content. believe me, you can survive without some of them for a day.
But if you don’t try it one day, you will never know. You will still keep dragging your big bag about thinking you might need everything you stuffed in in it one day.
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