Tragedy in this context is an event or occurrence causing great suffering or distress as a result of accident, loss, a natural catastrophe and so on.
It is one thing in life that no one ever prays for, wishes to know or experience.
But we do know tragedy. We do experience it. We all have, and at some point in time we all will.
Do not grudge pain. It holds on its hot blanket the evidence of life; handled and well managed, life from it takes its meaning
Olufunke Kolapo
We can say all we can do is be prepared for when it strikes. But we can never be prepared, not really.
When tragedy strikes, it knocks you off your feet and sometimes paralyses you so that you will never rise again.
It leaves you out of breath, numb, terrified, and disoriented that you can’t even remember how you got where it flung you.
And as if you never happened it whirls by in search of its next victim.
You are left in a daze, in the middle of nowhere turning in a gyre of agony and confusion.
So you say to yourself that you are not someone who gets knocked down, whose life is turned upside down, who is lost in the middle of nowhere with no compass or light to find your way to yourself.
You keep telling yourself you are not the one.
It is supposed to happen to someone else, someone without a face or name.
Someone other than you. It has happened, that is the truth.
When I was hit by a truck that took my leg and damaged my pelvis, it took me a while to accept the truth.
That I was the same person who left home that morning, the same person who had made so many plans the previous day, or the month before.
Sometimes, it still feels like a dream or another lifetime, I still imagine that I would just get up and walk without grabbing my walker, or crutches or buckle my leg on before walking.
But it is true, it is not a dream and I am not dead. I am not saying it is going to be easy because it’s not.
I am not asking you to snap out of it, to get up and move on. Or that you will get over it, because I haven’t.
Do you know why?
Whatever you have lost still remains a loss. Your job, limbs, opportunities, marriage, friendship, freedom and so on.
You can get a replacement but the tingling of the first loss remains just like phantom pain.
The person you lost is gone forever, the space they have left in your life and heart still remains vacant.
Take your time, catch your breath, you are the only one who knows how deep the hurt is, how painful the agony is. You set the pace.
Do remember though, don’t get lost in your tragedy, in your grief, don’t let the storm take you.
Cry if you must, scream if you can or if you want to. I kept it in for so long and ended up screaming in .y head. Believe me, it is unpleasant and exhausting
And remember, it is important to keep living on for as long as life gives you breath because that’s the only way they keep living on, in you, through you, your memories of them.
So, like an amputee grab those crutches or walker, fasten your leg and keep moving. Because you know it is the only way you get to move at all.
I always do that to remind myself, that as long as I’m still here, as long as I can move, I can get wherever I want.
I can be me because I am still me, just one leg short. Whenever I am down, I would move. I would get up, walk and breathe in some fresh air.
Whatever you can do that will not hurt you or someone else, if it keeps you going, keeps you hoping and living, do it.
Whatever you are doing right or that you can do to make you feel alive, make you human makes you feel you, keep doing it.
Keep moving one small step at a time; one day at a time.
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